Note for anyone reading this: Anything in a blockquote is not from me. For the parts I've written I'm really ashamed and embarrassed and I disavow most of it and I apologize.
Life is not a series of gig lamps symmetrically arranged; life is a luminous halo, a semitransparent envelope surrounding us from the beginning of consciousness to the end.
With fear, and a hope for the transience and instability of personal identity, I, as a queer, trans woman, collect here drops of lived experience. As such, there is neither narrative nor overarching theme, merely doubt and thirst.